A story about losing and
finding yourself again.

Sometimes in between you keep losing yourself. You lose who you truly are and what you truly want and what you truly believe in. Between the worries of trying to be perfect, neutral, always happy, political correct, worrying about others and their reaction and avoiding to be confronted with being viewed as weird or a bad person it feels like a zigzag route postponing the true you. But trying to please everyone and forgetting to listen to your own needs and truth can withdraw so much of your energy that at the end you are left empty, confused and lost. The story of Essena O’Neill made me think a lot. There is so much truth in all her words. She stopped taking social media photos and is now re-editing her photos with true captions. So listen to her story:

“I had everything I ever wanted. Now I’m here and I see how contrived, fake and forced consistently proving to the world ‘how amazing my life/body/self is”. I spent everyday looking at a screen, viewing and comparing myself to others. It’s easier to look at shiny and pretty things that appear happy than stopping and just getting real with yourself. Social media only became great for me because of the amount of effort I put in trying to portray this ‘perfect’ person, being born into the flesh I have and sharing emotional parts of my life. Being social media famous is a very unattainable thing for majority of people viewing this. I was attracted to the idea of being liked and of value. I put my value in numbers, not real life people, moments or my natural passions of art, writing… Posting on instagram consumed me. I can’t tell you how beautiful life is without a phone, without social media, without comparing, or likes or followers. We are not followers, we are beings of individuality and love. I have never felt so free. ”

“Imagine an entire generation hungry for change. Starving. Demanding. Hard working. Positive. Imagine a large group of individuals obsessed with making this world cleaner, healthier, more peaceful, more beautiful, more conscious? Imagine if every single person tomorrow morning woke up with the courage to say ‘I don’t like this about the world I live in, instead of accepting it, complaining or ignoring, I believe I can help change it’ or ‘This isn’t fair or right, why aren’t we all wanting to do something about it? Come on, together we can be the change!!’

No matter who you are, where you’re from or what physical form you were born into, if you’re reading this now you are so lucky. You may think you’re too different, or alone or unloved sometimes, but please remember how similar we all are. We all share something so powerful, so valuable, so beautiful… yet most of us ignore it, suppress it or ridicule others for it. What is it? It’s our ability to love, to care and to feel. In one phrase it’s this: every single one of us has the same underling desire to live and to live freely. Whether that’s free from physical harm, abuse, mental agony, comparison, shame, ridicule, discrimination, manipulation, deceit, access to real health information, clean air, a natural healthy environment…We all care about the world we live in because we live in it. We all care. Therefore ask yourself this, in a world supposedly more connected than ever before – why aren’t we seeing rapid positive changes? Why isn’t our youth waking up each day with a sense of undeniable empowerment to help the world or even a slight interest in global issues?

It’s simple, it’s because we are stuck living in distractions.  A 2D world. An addiction to screen life. We believe and obsess over contrived ideas, images and personalities. We live in a celebrity obsessed culture. We walk out into a shopping mall, watch a movie, turn on the TV, search the most popular people on YouTube, and what do we see? We see luxurious living, genetically blessed people, we see new clothes, sexy workout wear, tight abs, toned thighs, perfectly styled hair, painted masks, spray painted bodies. We don’t see real life. This celebrity culture based largely on aesthetics has taken over our own individual lives. We talk about these people like we know them, when in reality we know next to nothing about them, their fears, their dreams, their regrets. We put them on a pedestal and enjoy throwing rocks. We like watching them struggle, we mock them, humour ourselves… yet in the same breathe we complain about how we aren’t up there with them.

I didn’t live in the real world, I lived through screens. And I created a celebrity construct of myself, believing it would bring me happiness. That couldn’t be further away from the truth.

See, I didn’t grow up with the belief and determination that I could help shape the new world. I mean yes, of course, I always wanted to help or make a change, but I just never knew how. I thought I had to be a politician, or a celebrity, or a scientist to ever make a real contribution… I grew up identifying with a system based on social status, social approval and having an aesthetically pleasing physical form. That was what social media was for me. The pretty people got heard, the funny people mattered, the rich, the glamours… everyone listened to them. So I guess I convinced myself that a number on a screen dictated my value. It limited my potential here on Earth. It consumed me and killed all creativity.

The point is, I don’t have all the answers or solutions or ideas. Truth is I don’t know much. But I do know this; I no longer want to spend hours and hours of my time scrolling, viewing and comparing myself to others. I want to do something, anything, something radical, something a little different. I want to use my imagination, my individual mind, my unique take on this world. I want to research more into stuff that truly matters. Read more, listen more, ask more. I want to carefully study what revolutionary individuals and communities have done, grow from there, explore, learn, innovate. I want to challenge my beliefs everyday. I want to be a passionate, conscious, kind, creative and lively being. I want to work hard on projects, really really hard. I want to explore different ways to spread conscious messages of change. I want to be the change. I want to meet people who share this passion, learn with them, create with them, live with them. Are you one of them? I really hope you are. Well, if you’re someone who just can’t accept society the way it is – that’s fucking awesome. Some might say we have issues ‘coping with society’… I say we are game changers. We are the people who want more from ourselves and the current system we live in. I want to learn with you, talk about controversial ideas, documentaries, inspiring books, short films, real health, real present conscious living. Let’s do this. Lets be game changers.  “

“Why I stopped creating on social media: I was so focused on what I thought I should do for others that I ended up just wanting to please and please and please. My content wasn’t from my heart. I made myself into a machine that gave others what they wanted from me, never knowing or valuing my true self. I was lost to expectations, pressures and a fearful desire to be accepted. I was scared. I thought, ‘if other’s don’t like me, then I’ll have no value to this world.’ This way of thinking trapped me and killed my creativity. It was like I was enslaved in everyone else’s opinions of me… I overthought everything. I was miserable. Stuck. Uninspired. Angry. I didn’t enjoy the act of creating art, writing or any forms of self expression like I once did as a child. When no one judged it, I created without limitation or filters. When it was for no one else but myself, I fell in love with it. And it loved me right back. It made me feel alive. It was like capturing and expressing real life, real feeling, real beauty  – it gave me this joy that I still can’t explain. You know that feeling of inspiration, passion and purpose you get when you do something you just love? That’s why I do what I do. I don’t want approval anymore, it traps me into thinking I need more and more and more. I don’t want to be liked or judged either. I want a place where I can give with no expectations or outcome. I don’t want followers anymore. I want a world of individual beings. Can you believe I used to act and talk like they were mine; ‘my followers’ ‘your followers’…. I put myself on this pedestal, encouraging others to look up at me. ‘Follow me! Look here, don’t look at yourself! Oh please just view me, like me, like what I like, buy what I was paid to sell, comment on me, give me attention, share me, tag me!’ It was like I put a torch to my face pretending it was the light from the sun. For those who seek light (real happiness), you’ll never find it in social approval, for that in itself is an illusion based on artificial ideas and emotions. Pictures and videos are taken for a purpose.”

www.letsbegamechangers.com