"I’m an all or nothing kind of person." A moment with Asma Nasr

Story and interview by Adele Jancovici
Model: Asma Nasr
Photographs by Raya Fayaz

THE DREAM GIRL All girls are special. But this one, she’s a dream. She has a name like a forgotten flower, one that blooms high up in the mountains, a name that makes you want to whisper. She is not fragile, she is not shy, you could not break her. She has a million colors. Sensations that would be mistaken for words and poems you’d want her to inspire you, in her silent presence everything is given life to. She looks at you, she looks at me, she can see, and in one second, a bubble-gum second that stretches its pink body from here to eternity, she enraptures you. It’s her golden skin and her serpentine soul. It’s the plants she mumbles to and the roots she can understand the music of, you can not know her she’s not available to you. She lives somewhere far, far out in my dreams, nearby the frantic skies she reveres. Dust floats around her spirit and treasures of what ifs vanish. She is my thorny rhapsody. Darling, how I wish she could come pray to the moon with me.

Who are you?

This is probably the question that gets asked the most and I never know how to answer it.

My first thought is “I’m me” but if you don’t know me, it’s not helpful.

Who am I? I’m a human being. I’m a woman, a daughter, a sister and a friend. I’m a hopeful romantic, a plant lover, a food lover, an herbalist, a healing nutritionist, a holistic health practitioner, a nomad & traveller, an artist, a meditation teacher, a model, & forever a rock’n’roller at heart.

Where in the world are you right now?

I’m in Riyadh – Saudi Arabia where I lived when I was younger. I haven’t been back here in a really long time. But I’m based in NYC.

What makes you dream?

Poetry, wild flowers, the ocean, the moon, falling in love, growing, traveling, meeting new people, freedom.

What are your hopes for life and humanity?

For people to be free of suffering, for people to be happy. For people to come together, to take care of each other and to take care of this planet. For a kinder world. A healthier world. A brighter future for the next generations. For the government to care and protect the people.

For transparency, for kindness, for truth. For love.

“I’m a hopeful romantic, a plant lover, a food lover, an herbalist, a nomad & traveller, an artist, a meditation teacher, a model, & forever a rock’n’roller at heart.”

What saddens you?

What’s happening in the world, especially in Lebanon right now – which is where my father is from. It really breaks my heart.

What do you think love is?

Mmmmmmm… everything. Love is that grace that holds everything together. Even when everything is a mess and nothing makes sense. Love is devotion, trust, reverence, humility, patience, surrender, & the dissolving of the ego.

Love is being ok with being vulnerable and seen, showing up with an open heart, showing up for yourself, showing up for someone else, showing up for the earth, honoring, loving and appreciating each other for who we are. Support from friends and family. Holding space. Cooking for someone. Wanting to feel another person’s heart. Stepping into that place that no one really knows or opens enough to feel. That intimacy that can be overwhelming but having the strength, courage and bravery to do it anyways. Risking pain, heartbreak and suffering – choosing to be open – trusting the present moment. The willingness to be here. The ripeness of a heart, two hearts coming together, experiencing the fullness of each. Helping each other grow.

How do you love?

With everything I’ve got. I’m an all or nothing kind of person. When I love, I love really hard. I wrote a little fiery love note not long ago. I think it answers this question:

I see divinity in you.
& I fall in love,
As easy and as difficult as it is for me to open my heart to you.
Yet I do in my own ways.
I see beyond your layers.
I love hard, I love deep.
& sometimes I hurt myself in the process.
But that’s just how I am.
I feel my soul on fire.
& I can’t sit still.
I just want to hold your hand and run.

“Love is devotion, trust, reverence, humility, patience, surrender, & the dissolving of the ego.”

How do you spend your time?

Making tea, meditating, reading, journaling, moving my body, painting, making jewelry, making herbal oils for friends and family, researching, attending workshops & classes, working on some projects. I wrote a little guide/book for women that I’m so excited to share soon… & lately, I’ve been spending time with family and loved ones which makes me happy.

Anywhere besides here you could be right now?

Yes, in Lebanon, at the beach, stepping into the water for a swim as the sun sets. Probably one of the most beautiful experiences I’ve ever had… swimming in the ocean with the sun setting on the horizon and all I see is this golden light in the water. So simple but so powerful at the same time.